Saturday, September 23, 2006

what a long draggy day.
it was a bittersweet victory.
the process was unpleasant.

i was so worried when he told me they entered the repe, but i knew that he trained them well, so i was so happy when they got into semis, then to finals. it was nerve-wrecking to watch that race.... and it was so close, tooo close.
sigh...






no matter how little sleep i get, i won't lack insensitivity.



i took the bus at 2018. and reached home at 2144. YAY!

Friday, September 22, 2006

all i wanted him was to call me. not just call me, TALK to me. to tell me stuff, tell me how was his day, tell me what he has been doing, tell me he misses me, tell me the things i want to hear, or maybe not hear. and not keep quiet, cause the slience is killing me.
i rather he ignore me.



i would have gotten sore eyes at trg if i hadnt stop myself from crying.
taking it out on the water helped alot.
trg was surprisingly good today. and i felt so much better.



it was nice of rahman to come pick me up in that convertible again.
haha. it was a nice dinner, and it was a nice way to end my day.



















DIANA'S 21st BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!













my prediction was right.






work's at 7am tmr. -_-




you know what? if you look carefully, inside this big, strong armor of your's, you're the one who is really weak.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

just tell me have you ever really, ever really loved a woman.



last sea trg tmr before the weekend.
fight hard.

went to the ward to vist a friend yesterday.
anyway it's not really about my friend, it's about my friend's 'neighbour', the old lady.
you see, the old lady beside my friend was just calling out for a missey, then she spoke in teochew i think.
being me, i went to her and ask her what she wanted.
then she spoke to me in malay. -_- her neighbour's relative said that she likes to mumble to herself.
in the end i got what she said. as it was something about chuchi. then ah, i know it's something to do with washing, then she show her hands wiping her face. so there you go, she wants a wet towel to wipe her face.
so i looked into her side locker, guess what she only had diapers and a sweater.
then i turn and look at the the nurses' station, all i see is nurses documenting and doing their own thing.
and being me again, i went to the sink, took some hand towels and wet it for her.
the she thanked me thrice i think.
so i went back to my friend's bedside.
after a while the old lady call out to missy again.
she wanted to sit out of bed. BUT, she's on fall precaution. as she is 85 years old.
so i told her cant, but with 'mommy's ' help, we prop her up in her bed instead.


i was distrubuting some documents in the morning today, so when i walk into OR 6 i find the patient lying on the trollet familiar. i look through her case notes and realise she's the 'neighbour!' i quickly express my hospitality towards her. she smiled and said she remembered me and she thank me once again.
this kind of feeling makes me want to work in the wards. but i know, somehow it'll be different.
she made my day.

actually my day at work was awesome.
till i called him.
sigh.
there's this bitter feeling lingering inside.











it's the 10th day.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

' love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. love does not demand its own wat. it is not irritable or touchy. it does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong. it is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out. if you love someone, you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. you will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him. '
1 Corinthians 13:4 - 7







i thank God for luan, she has taught how to turn to Him, to seek answers when i have questions.
i'm beginning to understand what love truly is.

went to hard rock last night with round2 and ily. guess what?
there was only 3 chinese girls i think. the rest works there.
what a sight.
anyway it was reggae night, and the bushmen were playing live during some point of time.
and i've gotten a crush on bob marley's songs.
so this is what i found out.

his real name: Robert Nesta Marley
BORN: February 6, 1945, St. Ann, Jamaica
DIED: May 11, 1981, Miami, FL

we were born on the same day! haha.



there's this worrying feeling inside whenever i think about the race this weekend.
sigh.. i'm scared despite i know that i shouldnt be cause we train so hard.

i need to complete a few dozen birthday cards before i go on leave.

i need to go somewhere. to make the bad feelings disappear.


i'm love sick again. it's been a week and a day..
i'm going mad...





please help him, Lord